Our Cave

Tonight, I finally, truly understood the Allegory of the Cave, presented by Plato almost 2400 years ago. I was out for a walk, looking up at a full-moon when I realized that I wasn't really seeing the Moon. I was looking at it sure, but I wasn't really seeing it. It was as if the sky had been painted on. It was like a two dimensional, vivid painting that I was staring at. That's when I realized we all just watch the shadows on the wall. We barricade ourselves behind words and symbols and stereotypes. We don't see the world as it is, we see it through our filter of thought and motivation. Our past and our motives color everything we see and hear and sense. If I asked you to look at a car, instantly you would start drawing assumptions about the owner. Are they a fast, irresponsible driver or a self-centered, holier-than-thou driver? We are always making these predictions and assumptions, every second of every day. I'm finally starting to understand that living in the "now" means seeing the world before the filter, or at least understanding how the filter has changed our view of the world.

The Secret of Kells

I just watched an excellent movie called The Secret of Kells. It is an animated story about the making of the Book of Kells. It has incredible animation and vivid artwork; the music is moving and emotional; and the story line is completely engrossing. It really draws you in and feels almost too short. I would really recommend watching it. It's available to stream on Netflix and I'm sure it's available elsewhere.

Sad but True

This is a quote from the Persian poet Rumi [Jelal al-Din Rumi, translated by Coleman Barks, The Essential Rumi, Harper Collins Publishers]. On the surface it might seem horrible to pray for muggers and thieves, but the underlying message is quite wise in my opinion.

A certain preacher always prays long and with enthusiasm
for thieves and muggers that attack people
on the street. “Let your mercy, O Lord,
cover their insolence.”
He doesn’t pray for good,
but only for the blatantly cruel.
Why is this? his congregation asks.

“Because they have done me such generous favours.
Every time I turn back towards the things they want.
I run into them. They beat me and leave me nearly dead
in the road, and I understand, again, that what they want
is not what I want. They keep me on the spiritual path.
That’s why I honour them and pray for them.”

Those that make you return, for whatever reason,
to God’s solitude, be grateful to them.
Worry about the others, who give you
delicious comforts that keep you from prayer.
Friends are enemies sometimes,
and enemies Friends.

I found this quote while reading A Path with Heart by Jack Kornfield. In it Jack uses the quote to show how our difficulties and suffering in life are actually good for us. That we shouldn't push them away and hide from them, but that we should honor our mistakes and grow from them. If we push away all of the difficult feelings and emotions we have in life, then we are really just pushing away life itself. We need to use our mistakes and pain and suffering to learn the way to true happiness, but only through acknowledging them can we begin to learn that path.

Dracula

I just finished reading Bram Stoker's Dracula. Overall I thought it was a great read, definitely worthwhile. It had very vivid imagery and a decent plot-line. It was a little slow at times, but overall it kept my attention easily (which is saying something). My only complaint was that the ending seemed somewhat abrupt, nerve-wracking and intense, but still abrupt.

I think I'm going to try to always keep two books going at the same time: one non-fiction and one fiction/story-telling. Since I just finished Dracula I'm going to start another fiction. Most likely it will be Peter Pan by James Matthew Barrie. I also still have A Path with Heart by Jack Kornfield which is my non-fiction (more to come once I finish it).

On Vegetarianism (sorry Gopal)

I've had this thought rolling around in my head for a few days now and I thought I might as well get it out. I was thinking about how many people assume that Buddhism requires one to be vegetarian in order that we not kill any animals. It turns out that The Buddha was not a strict vegetarian, but would eat meat if presented to him as a guest. However, only if it were not slaughtered for him specifically [See here for more as it gets somewhat sticky]. This brought up the thought that many vegetarians (and non-vegetarians) think that it is better to eat plants than it is to eat animals. I disagree with this view; not because we should kill animals, but because we should view all life as equally valuable.

How can we judge the worth of any living creature, "conscious" or otherwise. When a plant senses something that is detrimental to itself, does it not grow in another direction? Just because plants and other non-animal creatures do not have many similarities to us does not mean they are not worthy of life.

My point in this post is not to say that we should live off dust and rocks, but that we should thank and respect any creature who gave it's life to grow ours. And in that respect does it really matter whether we eat meat or not? I agree with moderation in all things, but to essentially say that an animal's life is more worthwhile than a plant's seems to be against what most people think of as the philosophy of vegetarianism.

I'm not going to get into fruitarianism as that seems a bit overboard. Death is a natural process of life and I don't think we should feel the need to not kill anything, but we should certainly treat every living thing with respect. That means sustainable practices and humane treatment. In general I think we should all try to eat less and not gorge ourselves; eat more slowly so that we may enjoy our food and be mindful of how it came to be in front of us; and of course, before eating take a moment to be thankful to the living beings who gave their lives so that we may be sustained. And one more thing, every once in a while turn off the TV and enjoy the company of others around the table or the company of ourselves when no one else is around. Just by being mindful and enjoying life we pay tribute to those creatures who gave us so much.

A Fitting Quote

I find it interesting that a man who has seen so much power and conquered so many people had this to say near the end of his life:

"Do you know what astonished me most in the world? The inability of force to create anything. In the long run, the sword is always beaten by the spirit."
--Napoleon Bonaparte

On Loving 'Me'

While in the last post I spoke about how there is no me, I'm going to somewhat contradict that in this post. I'm not talking about the selfish kind of me, but about loving myself. In an odd way, only by realizing that there is no self can we learn to love ourselves. And only by loving ourselves can we learn to love each other.

This past weekend was somewhat tough. I found myself falling back into anxiety and unhappiness. I wanted to get so much done, but somehow I kept finding excuses to push off work. Every time I would push off work the little voice in the back of my head would shame me for not doing work. I kept striving after that calm, loving feeling I had grown into with my new meditative practices. I would tell myself, "If I just go to yoga today, then everything will be better. I'll get work done after that." However, my yoga practice didn't go well and so again I strove for that calmness by taking a meditative walk. But each time I tried for that calm, happiness I was confounded.

Today, however, I left the lab 20 minutes early and took a slow walk towards my class. I left my responsibilities behind and enjoyed the sunshine, the smell of flowers, the strength of the cedar trees along the path. I remembered how beautiful the campus is and I tried to extend that love that I felt to everyone I saw (which is a lot of people now that school is back in session). This made me feel much better and I was able to get to back to work after class. I attributed this change to my extending love outward, but I now think that there was also a vital piece that I wasn't taking into account: loving myself.

By finally letting go of the shame I had for myself at not getting work done I was able to bring peace and calm to myself. I hadn't realized that the reason I didn't want to work was because I was afraid of failing. Ironically enough, I was afraid of not getting the work done. As soon as I was able to break the cycle of shaming myself, I was able to be productive.

I believe, for me personally, this is my biggest issue to overcome. I need to be able to accept me for who I am. I get distracted and that's fine, but shaming myself for it is only making the problem worse. I'm finally learning to realize when I'm becoming distracted and come back to the now, not berate myself for it. As many Buddhist and meditative teachers say, imagine those toughest to love as they were when they were children and you will learn to love them as you would a child. I need to remember that I was once a child and still am in many ways. No one is infallible and the sooner I see myself in the same way the sooner I will be able to truly love others (and get some work done :).

On Patriotism

While on a train bound for New York City I overheard a group of people talking to the ticket collector. They were talking about how one of them could have gotten a military discount on his ticket. This brought my mind to soldiers and the frequently reborn buzz word: patriotism. I thought of all the appreciation given to soldiers and wondered, "Why?" I don't ask the question because the individuals are bad people or undeserving of love, but more fundamentally, "Why should we promote the killing of other humans, for any reason?" This brought me to questioning the basic idea of patriotism.

Patriotism by its very definition requires at least two distinct groups of people. One group is typically the "good-guys" and the other must therefore be the "bad-guys". While the levels of good and bad may be analog, there is still a very much digital "us" and "them". This brings up endless questions of where to draw the line. It can be seen in the recent flood of news stories about the proposed mosque being built near Ground Zero. The entire Muslim religion has been labeled a "them" and our patriotism, along with our desire to find a target for our anger, shock, and fear, has blinded us to that fact. We crave justice, although no matter how many people we bring to that justice we are never satisfied; nor will we ever be, since in this case justice is just another word for revenge. Only by releasing the anger and fear we have stored in our hearts can we begin to move on and be happy. Unfortunately, that anger and fear will remain as long as "they" remain; not Muslims, but just the concept of "us" and "them". As long as an outsider, a perceived threat, remains, so too will the feelings of anger and fear.

One way of remedying "them" is to neutralize "them" through force, control, and eventually violence. In other words: War*. However, War is a band-aid over a bullet wound; unless we remove the bullet the wound will never heal. There will always be another "them" to replace the previous "them". The only way to remove the bullet and heal the wound is to remove the divisive monikers of "us" and "them". If we view each individual as just that, an individual human being living out their life as best they can, then there is no "them" just "us"; and why would we want revenge against "us"?

Once we can view the world as an "us" it becomes perfectly clear that fighting against "us" is futile and self-defeating. Which circles back to the point, "Why should we promote the killing of other humans, for any reason?" I find the greatest example of "us" thinking is the Christmas Truce of World War I in which the soldiers from both sides of the battlefield came together to celebrate Christmas and more importantly their similarities as human beings. Imagine yourself as one of those soldiers, would you be able to, after looking a person in the eyes, say to them that they deserve to die because they live under a different government, or because they look different, or because they hold different beliefs than yourself? In the end we all have the same 83 problems in life, and the only thing keeping "us" and "them" apart is our own concept that there is an "us" and a "them". Once that veil is raised "we" can be happy.

* On a small side note, am I the only one that finds the term "War on Terror" a bit of an oxymoron?